I Miss You More Than My Eyes Show…


i miss you more than my eyes show,
my eyes never lie though,
because it is for a good reason that they act so,
nevertheless, good is being done with me watching from a distance, staying low.

i miss you more than my eyes show,
my eyes never lie though,
i am one secret admirer you have now,
i will stay so forever, if the acceptance doesn’t grow.

i miss you more than my eyes show,
my eyes never lie though,
seeds of love i sow,
how and when they get the rain and sunlight is left to nature, to whom i bow.

i miss you more than my eyes show,
my eyes never lie though,
will watch over you like a pure entity, like a rainbow,
for you shall admire me at least as so.

i miss you more than my eyes show,
my eyes never lie though,
i don’t measure distance in feet or words or hugs, but in how much i comprehend what your eyes show,
jacket on or not, new or ragged, there will always be winter’s snow.

i miss you more than my eyes show,
my eyes never lie though,
respect is what my eyes show,
for you can still share it all, the pain, telling me what transpired in life – what?when? and how?

i miss you more than my eyes show,
my eyes never lie though,
i miss you more than you are allowed to know,
sometimes tears flow,
sometimes smiles bubble and blow,
and so all the time, my eyes glow.

i miss you more than my eyes show,
my eyes never lie though.

It Hurts To Lift The Anchor – Haiku #5


.

.

” to lift the anchor,

heart harboured love, alone-

– in silence, it hurts “

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for a heart that harbored love for long, too long,

in silence and delusion,

it hurts while trying to lift the anchor (to speak out the love)

(extension)

because of the very reasons why it had to be harboured in silence  😐

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This post is an entry in Haiku Challenge for April 2012 at Haiku Heights. The prompt being “harboured”.

Careful With Your Eagerness – Haiku #1


” let thy hunger not behest,

for what thou art eager for,

else mere desire shall grow into irrational lust, your reflection’ll be a harbinger “

——————————————————————————-

in simple terms:

let your hunger not dictate,

about what you are eager for,

else, desire shall become lust, look at your own reflection to keep check.

———————————————————————————————————————–

This post is an entry in Haiku Challenge for April 2012 at Haiku Heights. The prompt being “eager”.

My first haiku. I never ventured into this form of poetry before and writing something in as short as 3 lines does seem a challenge and after you have done it will turn into a pleasure.

my recommends for the prompt “eager” :

1)  Cynosure : http://musedcynosure.blogspot.in/2012/04/eager-haiku.html

2 ) RAZZAMADAZZLE : http://razzamadazzle.wordpress.com/2012/03/31/raindrop/

All other entries for this prompt can be found here :

http://haiku-heights.blogspot.in/2012/04/april-heights-day-1-113-eager.html

Sacrificially Acceptable


The Distance Seems Unfair But......

The world is so small, it may seem,
But unless you see eye in eye,
You do not know how big it is,
And how far we are to each other.

It seems unfair,
But,
Sacrificially acceptable.

If i am given assurance that you would have a happy, loved and cared life, which you indeed deserve,
then,
I could…i think,
I just could bear it, all of it.

The Dark Of Mine Melancholic Soul


Mine Journey, Mine Self-Exile, Just Ask For It. Mine Love.

The dark of mine melancholic soul,
Hears not my own words,
Selfless and determined, it heeds not the dangers –
– Hidden and shadowed under lies and blinds of the world,
The winds tell no clue, nor promises to be a glue,
That would hold mine melancholic soul,
With its rightful destination,
Self-exile heavy on mine back,
Walking, not looking back,
Feet tell not how weary mine melancholic soul is,
From these nights and days of life,
That threaten to end that tender, thin string,
Holding mine melancholic soul –
– And mine love.

Mine love,
Fear not,
Mine journey is to nowhere but to where  i can find you happiness,
Mine journey is a search for nothing but for what gives you happiness,
Mine journey, mine self-exile, just ask for it.

Mine love,
Fear not.

“Yeh Jo Des Hein Tera” Kept Me Sane, Literally…


Yesterday.
It was an exam day and i was down with severe cold.

I was in the exam hall, halfway through the exam, ache swept my head, my eyes and i was unable to think or write properly.

I somehow finished the exam(not good) and then i sat inside the college bus. It takes nearly an hour on wheels to go back home.

Now, i am 20, a teenager, and i guess people can make out what and how PEOPLE make mess in their college buses.
I am a victim of such ‘teenage’ madness of the people around for almost my entire life. From high school to intermediate education and now into engineering 3rd year, all along.

So then, like my headache was so severe, it was blinding me, ears were paining and eyes felt like as if they were being dragged inside. It was literal hell. And add to that, these ‘talks’ of the mischief-makers, i thought i would go insane before i reach home.

To avoid going insane, i took my phone out and started listening to music through the earphones. I put the order of play as “shuffle” which meant a random choice.

After listening to a few songs, i was sure i was going to go insane because none of them were like soothing the pain, though all the time they were touching my heart, that is why i keep those songs in my phone.

Anyway, then the “shuffle” algorithm played “Yeh Jo Desh Hein tera(Instrumental)” – from Swades movie.
and that was that.

Headache lessened or not i do not know, but the hell that those people around me were showing surely vanished and i was in a dreamy place.

Yeh Jo Des Hein Tera…………… Aah..
The music just cleanses all the pains inside i guess.

A.R.Rehman’s work. i thank him.

I am still SANE.!

Yeh Jo Des Hein Tera..

So here is the instrumental, pure pure melody. i love it.

If I Am Gifted, Then I Loathe Myself (Above only to God)…


a2-b2 = (a+b)(a-b),
if i can learn this formula with one glimpse of it,
when others take 100-1000 recitations to master it,

and if that is called being gifted,
then damn, i loathe myself,
and i loathe god for doing it to me,
to put me above others,
and to force us into living with it.
unfair.

but i am proud of my choice. I defy god. If he could only see what i feel about all this, he would never dare to do something like this again.

P.S : This is just one of many such ‘gifted’ things, as they are called, which ruin lives than making them better. And i stand by it as hard as a rock against the sea’s constant threatening tides, just because the rock knows it has not chosen to be on the tide’s path. And if the tide thinks it was the rock’s choice to stand in it’s way, then the tide misunderstood the reality. Or should i say, God let the tide misunderstand the rock or to be exact, the reality. We are fools if we don’t see the truth. I am none who takes pleasure in being gifted. I counter question the simple ‘logic’ of being gifted. Who’s work it is? Who’s work it is to put lives of a few at the mercy of others, by birth that is. Just like this one?

These are questions one can understand only if he
1> is willing to spend time thinking of these ‘trivial’ matters
2> actually implements it
3> is willing to accept what ever truth that is waiting to be found
4> stands by the truth rather than wear a mask that would make his living safe and easy

As for the answers, well! God hid many things, We ourselves hid many things too. So, simply, its not easy.

i agree that pain,love,sadness and happiness are all equal proportions of life,
but damn the unfair proportions, right from birth. not for all though but for a good number and i choose to question the entire being of god for those few. be it people or animals or something else. God needs to answer me, for i talk of those who question him, for every unfair thing he created. I would do my bit to undo it, help the reality. But nevertheless, i won’t loosen the grip on his collar.

If this example was not clear enough, then i will clear the air with this arrow to your heart, Humans!

I am born with all limbs and senses working well,
Many in the world are not so lucky though,

what do u call it?

I am gifted?
Or they are cursed?

By choosing the first one, i did a favor to God. What the favor is? you ask?
You should understand,

being partial by gifting someone is a bit better than
being partial by cursing someone. (though both are a treason god made!)

and all this is naught but pure reality of time if there is no god at all.

I could easily say that it is the second thing, though that is what it really is. But i want people to know it. realize it. For that, i choose the first and thus i did god an unlikely favor. Protecting him from a mass rebuttal due to sudden realization. my choice would make things slow, realization slow. humans will start to ponder, rather than blindly believe just as they do now.

If some God believers felt offended, go tell it to god. ask it to yourself first, the second example i gave. After questioning the self, if pain doesn’t form a rock in your mouth, and if pain doesn’t form wound in your heart, and if pain doesn’t form lava in your stomach, then you are living a life that really is a not a life.

Blood Stained Nature…



Every start has an end // Every journey has a destination // Every heart has a last beat

Earth took birth aeons and aeons ago and stop guessing about ‘ when Nature took birth ? ’ because, that number would definitely not fit into the 1,00,000 TB (# approx., but something of that size anyway) of available memory in the world. So long it has been since it all started.

After Earth was formed, it took some millions of years for the newly formed young Earth to cool down the temperatures and form a camouflage around itself, the atmosphere. It took a few million years more for the still young Earth to start giving birth to life, probably an alien term then. Well, Earth was kind and warm for the new born and so Earth became Mother Earth as early as in the [2 x a few million]th  year that we are talking about (#do the math please). Even young Mother Earth was new to motherhood, so she struggled to keep her kids alive and in harmony. It was a long, desperate struggle which she dealt with patience and perseverance. It was another million years before she could get settled
into motherhood and looked after all her diverse children with equal spread of peace and love. During this period of [3 x a few million] years, all her children have been microbes, bacteria, amoeba, viruses, moths, fish, insects and a few other species of little creatures, intelligent ones of that time. Well, Mother Earth was very fond of them and she allowed this small community of species to spread over all the vast land that she possessed. The existent species fell into work very soon, their indigenous brains sought out new directions for mass civilization of their species and it took a good deal of a few million years for them to be satisfied with their work : a world of 10 billion diverse living species. Wow, that was some achievement! Now, after [4 x a few million] years, Mother Earth has blossomed into a fortress for living creatures. She took pride in stating the same, head held high. There were fish, a few million species of them alone, which have started the evolution of life on Mother Earth. Gold fish, may fish, shark, whale, dolphin, clown fish, tuna fish, cat fish; all these part of a rich aqua life which was the core of evolution of living beings. And there are these big foot species: elephants, mammoths, dinosaurs, rhinos, hippos and many more such lovable, palpable sons and daughters of Mother Earth of which dinosaurs were dominant. The dinosaurs themselves had a few thousands of species, few of them herbivores, few carnivores and few omnivores. Of the predator species, the most vicious species were Raptors which were the most ruthless among the whole of dinosaur species. But one notable sign of dinosaurs was that each dinosaur is a good parent! No matter how savage a dinosaur was to its prey, it was also most affable to its kids. Be it a grass eating, 25-foot tall dinosaur or a savage flesh eating dinosaur, they knew their duties well : One was the need for survival and the other was the need for revival. // Survival of self and  revival of race. // They hunt or kill for their own survival but look after their bearings with love, to revive and flourish their race. Thus passed a few more million years with this world starting to be a singular spectacle of harmony in diversity when suddenly, it was the rise of apes.

Even in the time of dinosaurs, there were many other species of living beings apart from them. One of which is the ape or monkey race. They were the most intelligible bearing of Mother Earth. You might ask a dinosaur, “Hey dude, how are you doing?” and die next moment for the rudely taken gesture. But ask a monkey the same question and you would be shell shocked seeing it scratch its head in reply. Now, that was better than the dinosaur’s answer right? So, these apes were really intelligent and over a period of time, it was beyond doubt that they were the most ‘brainy’ species that ever lived on Mother Earth. And i cannot comprehend what Mother Earth thought of apes, ( # “i feel she felt a more partial love towards her ape-children” ) but she started a whole new evolution in this single species. Till this [5 x a few million]th year, evolution was a process that belonged to the whole world, to that of the complete 10 billion species but now a second evolution, only of apes, has begun. It was the rise of apes indeed. The most intelligent community that lived on Mother Earth started to evolve into a more complex community, and undoubtedly into a more intelligent one. Thus came the age of humans and also the end of dinosaurs. Sadly, only after a few million years after the apes were starting to evolve into some more meaningful beings, a beautiful but destructive celestial(asteroid) collision struck Mother Earth a blow which robbed her of many of her children species of which the notable one is  the most physically dominant species that ever lived on Earth till then – Dinosaurs. A very grateful prospect it was for these newly evolved apes who no longer preferred to be called thus but humans.

Humans, though most intelligible species, were under-dominant in terms of physical prowess compared to their inferiors (‘inferiors’ i use because the humans have already started their over-dominant, reckless nature ). Civilization of human races took a few million years more and it was a few million years more before all civilizations approached a crossroad where they could no longer find an uncivilized patch of land to conquer. Here starts the Apocalypse. It was human nature to seek power, to stand high among everyone, to conquer the lands. It was just humane for them, but they never knew what they were kicking at. It was the Greek-Roman-Mogul-British all over the history of wars and kingdoms. There was fight for land, fight for peace, fight for women, fight for fun and even fight just for the sake of murder. Such was the build of ideologies of people of that time.

Enough of scientific and geographical description of Mother Earth! What i wanted to say here was something about this ‘doom’s day’ mania. But to talk about it, i wanted to give the readers a little over-the-surface  brush-up of the little past of Our Mother Earth.

The people today(come back to present time, i have let you wander enough in this brief past of 5-6 million years to make you fall in love with it, wake up!) run their so very busy lives in a way that can come to a winding halt right away with a single mass hysteria/propaganda. Let me tell you, there are real instances when people really believe that the world is going to end and so end their own lives feeling that they cannot see the world’s end. I am so very sorry and ashamed for their irrational behaviours. There are prophecies being made about the end of the world, calling it Apocalypse. And most of these prophecies revolve round the Mayan-theory and the date 21st December, 2012. And the human brain always  actively percepts dangers, deep emotions, intense hatred, terrific fears due to which most of the humans who don’t  control their brains properly fall into this mass hysteria.

But my point is not that. I TOTALLY BELIEVE THAT THERE IS A DOOM TO EARTH IN FUTURE and i deny to put a date to it myself or accept any suggested by others. My point here on the Armageddon is the doom we humans bring unto ourselves. Yes, HUMANS ARE THE DOOM THAT MOTHER EARTH IS THREATENED WITH. We have become such intolerable living beings, i fear that one day MOTHER EARTH’s heart will burst out with grief about her MEAN, SPOILED CHILD –> US !!!

That is the real Doom’s day, the day when we break our Mother Earth’s heart completely.

And thus my illustration.                                                                                       S Jayanth.    

Original Post at : http://thephoenixarts.wordpress.com/2011/09/05/burning-like-hell-hey-i-m-talking-about-2011-200th-year/